Friday, March 13, 2009

Follower: a person who imitates, copies, or takes as a model or ideal

I am not comfortable being a leader. Therefore, after having a "follower" list on my sidebar for a short time, I took mine off. Funny how some of the new gadgets on Blogger get my attention when they first appear and then, after I've had time to think about them for a while, I eliminate them. But this morning I noticed I have 9 followers. That's down from 11 a long time ago when I last noticed that particular statistic on my log-in page. Oh, dear! I once read the header on someone's blog a couple of years ago that stated: "Read by tens of people everyday". That's not even true for me anymore. I'm slipping, folks! HA!

I hardly ever notice the time of day anyone posts but check my time out -- 7 am! That's almost unheard of for me. Can you guess I'm 'childless' today? Tomorrow is Dylan's 3rd birthday so my son and his wife took today off from work to spend a family day together. I don't know what their plans are but I do know mine: nothing structured. Maybe nothing at all. I had Dear Hubby wake me up just before he left for work and then spent some time watching the latest episode of "The Biggest Loser", fast-forwarding the boring parts, while I ate my breakfast. Having been a yo-yo binge & purge food addict emotional eating dieter most of my - younger especially - adult life, I can surely identify with a lot of the issues these contestants talk about on there. I am always especially thrilled when I see the end results of those who are voted off and continue on their own to lose the excess pounds. I hope most are able to keep those pounds off but when statistics tell you 95% of weight losers usually gain all - and more! - of their weight back eventually...well, I'm hoping that's not true of these people. One particular part of this episode really hit me between the eyes because even tho I've managed to maintain the weight loss I had last year, I still have a tendency to 'reward' myself with occasional binges of some foods I really like. And then, when I wake up the next morning feeling bloated and 'sludgy' and sluggish, I could kick myself. Luckily, with the lifestyle I have right now, I do so much walking and I'm so constantly on the go with my grandsons, I seem to be able to burn off whatever extra 'poison' calories I consume. But why...WHY?!...can't I seem to break that binge mindset? They say being a food addict is like any other addiction, tho, and it's a continual never-ending battle to overcome the temptation of whatever vice it is that has a hold of our lives, our minds. If an alcoholic or drug addict or gambling addict feels the same way about their habits as I do about mine, I think I can say I understand just how hard it is for them to overcome theirs. Dear Hubby, a man of almost steel-like self-discipline, doesn't understand. At all. And that's why it's very hard for my daughter and me to get across to him it's a mind game. Certainly it has its physical appearances of the damage it does to our bodies but that's not what it's all about in a food addict's mind. It's being consumed 24/7 mentally about where our next food-fix is coming from. How we'll go out in the middle of a blizzard to buy a half gallon of chocolate ice cream if that's what we're desiring, we're craving it so badly. Or stashing food items away in the craziest places where we know no one else in the family will look -- like the dryer or behind the stack of sheets in the linen closet. In our underwear drawers. Bleccchhhhhhhh. Well, one thing I'm learning...if I crave something, I try to make it something that won't 'hurt' me as much as my choices in the past did. For instance, instead of sitting down and eating a pound-bag of MnM's at midnite, washed down with a Pepsi, I might make myself an extra bag of 100 calorie popcorn. But still, that's not what it's all about. It's about why do I have to eat it in the first place?!?

Oh well.

I got a notice in the mail from my primary care doctor the other day, reminding me it's time to go in for my annual Pap smear. I got a good chuckle out of that. I have nothing left that needs that exam anymore. No periods for a year now! Life doesn't get much sweeter than this, let me tell you!


Dori said...

From the very beginning when blogger introduced the Following idea I found it somewhat disturbing. I just don't like that word--follower. Blech. For the longest time I didn't even keep a blog roll--mainly because of one individual blogger who got in a tiff over being removed...even though she had declared she was no longer going to keep her blog. So I just took the whole thing off and only linked to my husband.

Anyway...back to YOU! Happy birthday to Dylan! Yea! I have found that 3 is just a delightful age. Still have the meltdowns but he's more in control of his emotions--better able to express himself. Simply delightful!

Enjoy your day of NOTHING! You deserve more of those than you allow youself!

Mrs Parks said...

Maybe you read reminder wrong and it really said it's time for a "Pabst Beer".
I don't have the followers thing on my page either.

Donna said...

I was going to remove the follower thing, but there was an outcry that couldn't be denied, so I left it. What I don't like about it is that I tend to notice every time somebody quits being a follower. I wonder who, and why. I'm above 100 now, but you watch: Within the next few days a couple of readers will resign.

missy moo said...

Hi Kris,
Don't fall over with shock!!! I am still around. Just don't get on the computer as much. Work still very busy, I am incharge at the moment while my boss is away. Roll on one more week hahaha.
Anyways - with regards to your pap smear. My Dr. told me that you should still go in for a check up. I think it depends whether you still have your cervix etc etc, it isnt the usual pap smear but one very similar. I thought that because I had had a hysterectomy I didnt need one - but alas I do !!!!!
Hope you are all well. We are pretty much over the HOT weather, thank goodness. Autumn weather is finally upon us - hurrah, I love this time of year. My garden is in desperate need of TLC too. Hopefully over the next few weeks I can get out and tidy it all up again.
Take care
Luv Missy Moo & Co