Tuesday, February 12, 2013

And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt. ~ Sylvia Plath

From as far back as I can remember I have wanted to be a writer.  I have wanted to hold a brand new book in my hands, crack open the spine, and know that it's mine.  At the age of almost 60, I still dream about that moment.  I wonder how Grandma Moses felt when she finished her first painting?  She was in her 70s when that happened, so dreams can come true at any age.  Why do we feel we need to put an age limit on dreams? 

I began writing a novel a few months ago.  It has been percolating in a back corner of my mind, like an old-fashioned coffee pot on a back burner, for a long, long time.  I held off on writing it and I'm glad I did.  I don't think I had enough life experiences, enough perspective into the mindset of my characters, to do it justice when I was, say, 35 or even 40.  I was too busy trying to make sense of my own life and honestly, a woman of 35 is not very 'mature' when it comes to wisdom gained and hindsight.  I know for myself I never grew to be comfortable in my own skin, to know myself, until I reached my 50s.  Midlife is very liberating.  You start sloughing off so much 'stuff' that has held you captive your entire life, the baggage you've been dragging behind you like a martyred victim.  We're all victims.  We just need to get over it and move on.  I have never met even one person who hasn't been seared and scarred in some way, not even the most seemingly well-adjusted and successful ones.

I've hit one of those writer's blocks, tho...I am literally terrified to take the next step.  So I asked friends and family on Facebook to give me a pep talk and they have been so encouraging and supportive.  I'm thinking I may have it in me to kick it into gear again and get busy writing.  Because, you see, I do have a story to tell.  And it's time for it to be told.


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MerCyn said...

Sometimes the hardest part is getting the first words down. Good luck and never give up.