Reason is our soul's left hand, Faith her right. ~ John Donne

I was sitting in a pew at church this morning reading a Bible and I opened to this scripture:

"Now also when I am old and grayheaded, O God, forsake me not; until I have shewed thy strength unto this generation, and thy power to every one that is to come."

Psalm 71:18

Now, if that wasn't God coming to me and hearing me in my hour of deep need, I don't know what is. He was speaking directly to my heart.

I still have the first Bible my Dear Hubby gave to me when we were new Christians. It is so worn out the front cover has fallen off, the pages so thin they're almost transparent. It is held together with a big rubber band. It is tucked away for safe keeping in a bin filled with My Treasures. And written by my own hand on the back pages is this:

"A Bible that is falling apart usually belongs

to someone who

isn't."

And I believe that to be true. No matter what has crossed my path these past 34 years, I have found what I need in God's word. He has never, ever forsaken me.

A Soft Answer Turneth Away Wrath... ~ Proverbs 15:1

....and the rest of that scripture says: "...but grievous words stir up anger".

I've put this to use in Life so far with some pretty amazing results. I put it to action again on Friday when one of my neighbors lit in to me:

"Why don't you have a car? How do you expect to take those kids anywhere if you don't have a car? I never have understood why you have two trucks! You could at least have a King Cab!"

I told him we prefer trucks. And I said, "You see me out walking them all the time. We go all over the place on foot and by bus."

"I feel sorry for you. You don't have a life. They better be compensating you well for all the time you take care of those kids! You're a recluse. You never do anything. I never see you do anything as a family. You're so strange. What's the matter with you?!"

I told him I'm very content with my life; I'm doing exactly what I want to do with it. How much they pay me isn't an issue. I am getting close to 60 years old and when I have my weekends I like to relax and recharge my battery; that my son works most Saturdays. Both he and his wife work many hours.

"You never do anything with people! What's the matter with you...is that part of your religion?! How come you never have family or friends over? Why aren't you taking those kids to Disneyland? Why don't you take them to Pioneer Square?"

I told him I get up at 3 and go to bed at 7. Dear Hubby gets up at 1 and goes to bed at 6. We don't have TIME to have people over. Plus, my family is so small I have very few members. The kids and I go downtown on the bus. Dylan is going to Disneyland next Spring. Cooper is too little.

"Well, I've just never seen anything like you! You have the strangest set-up I've ever seen. I feel so sorry for you. Tell them they need to send you on a cruise so you can meet some people."

And when I started to answer that --- that I suffer horribly from motion sickness and don't WANT to go on a cruise -- he picked up his phone, turned away from me, and ignored me.

Well.

I didn't have any clue where that tirade came from. We've lived next door to him for 28 years, quite peacefully, and even tho he's always been a busybody, he's never blown up at me like that.

To say my feelings were hurt is the understatement of the century.

Good thing he wasn't home when Dear Hubby got here. When I told him what happened he was absolutely livid! But the neighbor was gone until late Friday nite. Lucky for him, haha!

Yesterday morning I took off to buy my groceries. When I came home, there's the neighbor sitting on his porch. Uh oh. Now what? But as I got out of my TRUCK he called out to me. He said, "I want to apologize for my behavior yesterday, Kris. I don't know what came over me. I had no right to treat you like that. What you and your family do is your own business. I think I'm just becoming a grumpy old man." As we talked some more, come to find out he'd gone to visit his daughter at the coast and the two of them had had a huge argument. He said he'd been trying to tell her what to do, too, and she hadn't appreciated it at all. So he came home stewing and fuming and took it out on me, and that wasn't right and he was sorry.

I told him how much I appreciated his apology, that what he'd said had hurt my feelings more than just about anything that had ever been said to me in my life so far. That really made him feel badly...he told me he'd never meant to do that.

And now...we're back to being friends. Living peacefully next door to one another again.

Life goes on.

Life is like an onion. You peel it off layer by layer and sometimes you cry. ~ Author Unknown

I don't know why but I love these roses.

It's been an eventful week. Nothing earth-shatteringly earth shattering, but information that needs to be taken in, sorted out, and accepted. But you roll with the punches. You try to.

You pick yourself up by the bootstraps.

Brush yourself off.

Keep your chin up.

Don't cry over spilt milk.

Laugh in the face of adversity.

OK, Mom. I still hear your voice echoing in my head.

Thank you for the advice.

Another Great End-of-Summer Read...

"The Stuff That Never Happened" by Maddie Dawson

Memories of You....

("Memories of You" by Leenie)

Just because I love this photographer to pieces.

And she's so humble she doesn't realize her own talent.

It slays me.

And because she's such a beautiful person.

Because she's there for me when I need her.

She knows why.

Thank you, my Leenie Beanie.

Never be afraid to sit awhile and think. ~ Lorraine Hansberry

When I can look Life in the eyes,

Grown calm and very coldly wise,

Life will have given me the Truth,

And taken in exchange - my youth.

~ Sara Teasdale

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity. ~ Albert Einstein

I wrote a couple of days ago about getting Dylan 'connected' with online educational games on the internet. The more I search, the more I find, and he is totally fascinated by them all. Especially the ones on PBS. He loves the Caillou Train Game, Dinosaur Train's "All Aboard", and a Super Why "Three Little Pigs" game featuring Alpha Pig. I am amazed...simply amazed...at how a 4-year-old can catch on so quickly to clicking and dragging and maneuvering a mouse around. I thought my children's generation was tech-savvy. Now it's their children who are making us older folks not just dinosaurs but literally extinct!

One thing I have noticed is even tho Dylan's a very big boy for his age -- in to size 8 clothes and he isn't even 4 1/2 yet -- his hand isn't quite able to grasp an adult-sized mouse very comfortably. I decided to do a search this evening to see if I could come up with a smaller alternative and the ones I have pictured here called the Tiny Mouse by Chester Creek looks like it might fill the bill for both of us. Not only is it advertised for kids but it's also supposed to be very comfortable for us more advanced in years who have arthritis in our hands and fingers, like I do. I also have the disadvantage of being totally left-handed and was forced in the 1980s by a boss to learn how to do 10-key and the mouse right-handed. Maybe a smaller less-bulky mouse will help me be a little more coordinated with scrolling and all that. I have tried switching my mouse to use left-handed but it scrambled my brain so much learning to do it right-handed to begin with I don't want to scramble up what brain cells I still have left any further. I had to bring an adding machine home to use every evening after work to punch in telephone numbers to learn 10-key. I would go to sleep dreaming about numbers and wake up thinking about numbers. All that on top of being a mom, a wife, and trying to run a household as well as an 8-hour job every day. I would practice for a couple hours every evening. It was a time in my life I was so sleep-starved that a good portion of that decade is a blur to me. Back then you couldn't complain about stuff like that in the work place. You shut up and did your job.

So...I ordered one and it should arrive in the next few days.

For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away. -- James 4:14

The scriptures say our lives are nothing more than a vapor.
In the scheme of things, I know this to be true.
And as I sit here and consider my role on
Earth,
I come to realize more and more
that what I am
in the realms of God's eternity
is nothing more than a
mote caught
in a shaft of sunlight.
And yet He knows right where I am.
He knows
my sorrows and my joys.
He is my balm.
My
Comforter.

Sea Shells -- for Dylan

Sea Shells

For Dylan

It's a funny thing about sea shells.

Some you can take and crush in your hand,

and yet they withstand the roilings and boilings in a heaving, stormy sea.

Some are pearlescent.

You can almost see the sun through them.

They're smooth to the touch.

Cool to the fingertips.

You can lift them to your lips.

You can taste the sea.

Others are heavy and dense.

Almost ugly.

Until you hold them up close and see how God

made them beautiful

if you only take the time

to look.

God pours life into death and death into life without a drop being spilled. ~ Author Unknown

(Portrait of an Old Woman by Adolph von Menzel)

Today would be my mother's 83rd birthday if she was still alive. I am posting a poem I wrote for her shortly before she died in 1989. I've printed it before, but this is one that she especially loved, so this is for her:

Private Pain

There is a place of private pain where only you can trod.
The path is not an easy one unless you trust in God.
The times you feel you can't go on, when no one understands,
The Lord is there to ease you through, to take you by the hand.

There is a place of private pain where silent tears are shed,
Where Jesus is beside you, giving comfort as He said.
His arms wrapped close around you and His Holy Presence near,
You know you can rest easy and you needn't ever fear.

There is a place of private pain...I'm in its midst right now.
I know the Lord's preparing me...I cannot tell you how
But in my heart of hearts I know that when I need Him near
The only thing I'll do is ask and He will be right here.

Hot 'n Fun in the Summertime -- NOT!

Son and family recently went to the beach for the weekend. It was a spur of the moment trip, and the motel room they got was just about the last one available in Lincoln City. It was the weekend when temps soared close to 100 degrees here in Portland. Hmmmmm...it sure wasn't 100 degrees at the coast, was it? I don't think it reached 70. Amazing what a difference 100 miles can make, isn't it? Luckily for them, when they came back they have central air conditioning in their home. I can't imagine hopping in a car and coming back to almost a 40 degree higher heat in a little over two hours later.

Even so, a happy time was had by all. Well, except for Coop. He was a grump. But they managed to get outside and have some fun playing in the sand.

Dylan and Dad

The Coopy-meister

An excellent book for a late-summer read.

Thank you, Pam, for reviewing it and

bringing it to my attention.

A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise. ~ A.A. Milne

I know my days as a woman in a bikini who takes my Dear Hubby's breath away are far, far in the distant and before-I-ever-gave-birth-to-two-huge-babies past. But since I can no longer push my grandboys' combined weight of around 100 pounds for 4-5 miles in a double stroller I am becoming desperate for some form of aerobic low-impact exercise before I become a flabby blob of useless mush. I am already noticing in the past couple of months since I put the stroller out in the yard with a "Free" sign on it how achey and stiff I'm becoming. With my up-and-down-off-the-floor a hundred times a day schedule, this is not good. Not good at all. And I'm getting all soft around the middle. That's even worse yet. I haven't had to go to larger clothes yet, but everything is feeling uncomfortable around the waist, just because I've never had extra 'loose' skin around there. Ugh. Ugh. And ugh.

So...I did some searching on low-impact aerobic DVDs and came up with this one. Most reviewers gave it 4-5 star ratings. I can not get up any earlier -- it's at 3 am right now while Dear Hubby's on his insane work shift and he wakes me before he leaves -- and I can't go to bed any later because I definitely need my rest. I thought maybe if I buy one of these I can put it on in the mornings after the grandboys arrive and they can exercise along with me. Or sit and laugh at me. Or whatever. They love to dance, so if this has good music and lots of action, who knows? Maybe one of them will become a future physical trainer! And both boys are already learning to flirt with pretty young women...and who is prettier than Cindy Crawford? I don't think they'll mind watching her! I have got to do SOMETHING!!! I can't stand not being as active as I was. Todays' walks equal out to maybe a mile or two at the most, take upwards of two hours, and just meander, now that Coopy does his 'big boy' walking. No strollers for him at all without a huge fuss. These do not get Grandma's heart rate anywhere up where it needs to be.

Dylan and I sat down at the computer the other day and we looked up some games on the PBS Kids' web site. I would never have dreamed what a natural this kid is for learning how to maneuver a mouse and to learn the drag-and-click method. After giving him the basic instructions as to how to put his hand on the mouse, showing him how it glides across the pad, and how the cursor points everything out, he took off and within a few minutes told me, "Gram, I can do it myself now. Go away." So I backed off and he played the "Caillou Train Game" for half an hour. Then he'd had his fill and wanted to go play outside. But I told my son about it...his wife told her mother about it...and when Grandma U comes up from Texas to visit in a few weeks, she's bringing Dylan his very own computer. I found a great site for teaching young children how to type on keyboards . And a great site for all kinds of free online teaching games for Kindergarten thru elementary school age. What I like about them all is how educational they are, as well as being so much fun. Dylan, I'm sure, will be enthralled.

It seems like every day now he's growing up. Which means he'll grow away. Which means I have to let go. Not easy. Not easy at all.

84 Things About Me

Are we egoists, we bloggers who like to do memes? Who like to tell our reading world what makes us tick and what we like and what we hate and....well, the list is endless, isn't it? Even with all the memes I've done, don't think to yourselves that I've revealed all that much about myself. No. You see, I expose what I want to expose. The private side of me doesn't emerge much here, not the 'inner world' that all of us have but few of us reveal. The voice that talks 24/7 in my head. My 'thought world', I guess you could call it. But I happened to stop by Simone's blog this evening and she'd done one on 84 things and challenged others to do the same thing. Since Simone is someone new to me in the bloggy world, a recent transplant to Portland from southern California and who knows me about as well as I know her...which isn't well at all yet...and I'm tired and my brain isn't up to anything deep or even shallow. Well...here are my 84 things in no apparent order. I'll type them as they come to me and I'll really try to put things in here I've never mentioned before:

1. I loved Popeye the Sailor Man when I was a little girl. I ate a whole 20 ounce can of spinach when I was 4, thinking I'd be strong like Popeye. All I ended up being was extremely sick. I have never eaten cooked spinach again.

2. I taught myself how to ride a bike. I never had training wheels. I was maybe 6 at the time?

3. Ricky was the first boy I ever kissed, out on the playground when we both ran to get a kick ball that went behind the first-grade annex. I was 6. He had the cutest dimples.

4. My Dear Hubby taught me to drive when I was 20. He tells me I drive like a guy.

5. I once locked my mother out of the house when I was 6. Deliberately. Boy, did I get spanked when I finally let her in!

6. 6 seems to have been a very eventful year for me.

7. I got seasick on the Megler ferry that used to cross the Columbia River at its mouth between Washington and Oregon. Before the big toll bridge was built. It was a stormy day and, mercy, did I wish I could die! It used to take the ferries about half an hour to cross the river there but it seemed to be an eternity that day.

8. Speaking of that ferry, it reminds me of the time I climbed to the top of the Astoria Column 3 times in a row. It has 164 steps, so that equals out to 984 steps up and down. Without any stopping in between. The next day I had such horrible charley horses in my calf muscles I could barely stand. That time I was around 11.

9. I went to Universal Studios when I was 20 while visiting my California-Friend-Liz ...in our family we differentiate between my two good friends named Liz by calling them Best Friend Liz and California Liz so we don't get mixed up when I'm talking about them...and while taking the tour of the lot I saw Lorne Green of "Bonanza" fame and Susan St. James who was on "Kate & Allie". That was back in 1973 so I'm not sure what she was famous for back then...maybe the show with Rock Hudson? Wasn't that her? Anyway, I was greatly disappointed by how human they looked. He was much shorter than I thought, and she had a big backside in comparison to the rest of her build. He smiled at us and waved. She just sauntered by and ignored us. Hmmmphhhh. So much for fame.

10. When I do these, I wonder who on earth sticks thru and reads them to the end? I'm doing them mainly for my grandsons to have in the future. Can you imagine what they'll think about me some day?! And to think I'm responsible for their daily care 11 1/2 hours per day. Scary thought.

11. I used to get hemorrhaging nosebleeds, bad enough one time where I had to be hospitalized. Our family doctor finally cauterized the inside of both nostrils and I never had another bad nosebleed after that. I was...again...6.

12. I used to think I was adopted. My mother couldn't find my birth certificate thruout my entire childhood. She finally found it stuck to the back of my oldest brother's, stuffed in to his envelope. I was 18. By that time I didn't care.

13. I had a huge crush on Lawrence Welk when I was little. We watched his show every Saturday nite and I thought he was so elegant when he'd go out into the audience and dance with all the old ladies at the end of the show.

14. I idolized Annette Funicello. Totally. I loved watching "Mickey Mouse Club" so I could see her. I loved her records, too.

15. I used to win awards for my penmanship in grade school. I got a pen/mechanical pencil set for an award one year and was so proud of it I took excellent care of it and it lasted me well into adulthood.

16. My dad and I once got lost together out in the woods searching for a Christmas tree. We found our way back eventually, but it was pretty scary.

17. My dad once took me fishing on a train trestle. He told me it was abandoned and trains never used it. So as we're sitting there fishing, what do we hear but a train whistle and we could see a train coming up fast in the not-too-far distance. Boy, did we scramble back to shore!

18. We used to go out for Sunday afternoon drives just about every Sunday as far back as I can remember.

19. I once got mad at my next-oldest brother and threw an 8-ball from a pool game at him. I hit him right between the eyes and cold-cocked him. My great-aunt Etta who was babysitting us that day -- our mom was in the hospital giving birth to our youngest brother -- thought for sure I'd killed him. I was...guess what...6.

20. I went to 3 different middle schools and 3 different high schools. I hated every single one of them.

21. I'm sure my attitude had a lot to do with it, but I didn't have many friends at those schools.

22. I never learned how to climb trees. Amazing, considering what a diehard tomboy I was.

23. I have never eaten eggplant. Something about the purple skin and the yellow innards just doesn't do it for me.

24. I can wiggle my ears.

25. I am nowhere near as 'saintly' as people tend to think I am. I am the first to admit I'm very, very human.

26. Death doesn't bother me. And I am very good at end-care for those I love.

27. I am not easily embarrassed.

27. I can laugh at myself.

28. I laugh at myself a lot.

29. I would live by the ocean if I could.

30. I have learned it's better to forgive and move on.

31. I craved watermelon when I was pregnant with my son, to the tune where I could sit down and eat a whole one all by myself. And I did. A lot. And my son weighed 12 pounds. Not that the watermelon had anything to do with that. But the MnM's I also craved probably had a lot to do with me weighing over 200 pounds when I gave birth to him!

32. But when I had my daughter -- who weighed almost 10 pounds -- I weighed 8 pounds less the day I took her home from the hospital than I'd weighed when I got pregnant. I could fit right back in to my jeans.

33. I found my first gray hair when I was pregnant with her. I was 22.

34. You'd have to search long and hard to find a dark hair on my head now.

35. I loved the Franco Zeffirelli version of "Romeo and Juliet". A friend of mine had the soundtrack album from it and I borrowed it and memorized the entire thing. I got to where I could recite a lot of passages from the actual play by Shakespeare.

36. I have always spent a lot of time inside my head.

37. I write much, much better than I speak.

38. I always wanted a horse.

39. I have gone skinny-dipping.

40. I have been inside the Ape Caves.

41. I have had a family member who was murdered.

42. I have not had an alcoholic drink in almost 34 years.

43. I have never smoked. Tried one or two as a teen but hated them.

44. I suffer terribly from motion sickness. Probably why I don't like to travel much.

45. I sleep on the left side of the bed.

46. I can't sleep in a room with a door closed. Long story on that one.

47. Sorry...a few of these are 'old' revelations, but this is harder than you think, and I have a lot of newer readers who haven't been around all that long.

48. I once snorted a pea up my nose. And I couldn't get it back out. It lodged itself way back somewhere. Then one day I blew my nose and...voila! There was the pea! Several months later.

48. I have a very gross sense of humor.

49. My Dear Hubby makes me laugh more and harder than anyone else on earth. He is a very funny man.

50. I love a lot more deeply than people would ever realize.

51. I once used to look so good in a bikini it took Dear Hubby's breath away. Those days are far, far in the past.

52. I would rather be comfortable than fashionable.

53. I am not easily swayed.

54. I am addicted to the game "Rainbow Web". I even bought the download version so I have it on my computer. The only reason I mention this is because I am so totally NOT a game person. I hate board games. Except for Trivial Pursuit, which I play very, very well.

55. I am not arrogant, but I am confident. Vast difference there.

56. I will not tolerate rude, crude behavior.

57. I think I'll be a very interesting old person if I live that long. I love the poem 'Warning: When I am an Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple". That will be me.

58. I was there when a beloved family friend of ours heard the news her fiance had been killed in Viet Nam. That made the war very real to me.

59. When I was a little girl I once saw a standard Poodle kill the entire batch of kittens our cat had just given birth to. That deeply affected me for a long time.

60. I am not squeamish.

61. I am very quirky.

62. I love loud music.

63. I love driving in my truck listening to loud music.

64. I am becoming somewhat hard of hearing, probably due to my love of loud music and listening to it that way most of my life.

65. The first album I ever bought myself was "The Supremes A Go Go"

66. I watched The Beatles on the first "Ed Sullivan Show" they appeared on

67. I would rather sit on my back porch reading a book and basking in the sunshine, listening to wind chimes and bird song and the wind in the trees than just about anything else on earth.

68. I am a very complex woman living a simple life.

69. I never went to college. Everything I've learned has come from books. And the School of Life.

70. I can drive a clutch better than most men.

72. I detest social obligations.

73. I love to spend time just sitting around talking with Dear Hubby.

74. When I was young, motherhood was never very high on my priority list. I don't know why. But once I became one I couldn't imagine life not being one.

75. I have read the entire Bible 8 or 9 times. I've lost count. King James Version only.

76. I am very devoted to giving my grandsons a rich tapestry of experiences while they're under my care.

77. I once had a cat named Knucklehead.

78. I have never enjoyed Life more than seeing it thru the eyes of my children when they were small and now my grandchildren. Tho this time around I have the luxury of having time to smell the roses.

79. When I die I want the song "Victory in Jesus" played. Or sung. I don't really care which. But that song tells my life story in a few verses.

80. I lived in a house that was supposed to have been haunted. So did he.

81. I have had many, many people cross my path in my lifetime so far, but I've allowed myself to be close to only a few.

82. I've had few regrets in my life but the main one is I've never been able to get my next-oldest brother to reconcile with me. He has not spoken to me or acknowledged me in 18 years. I have several grand-nieces and nephews I've never met or haven't seen since they were babies. Life is too short too hold such bitter feelings....a long long LONG story....but some people just don't know how or don't want to forgive. Even if they're family, we can't make them love us.

83. My life began again in 1999. I found myself then.

84. I wouldn't change one thing.

After a day like today I could use a good laugh...

Finally explained!

(Click on photo to enlarge)

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. ~ Corey Ford

Since writing about this it seems to have become a world-wide epidemic! In Colorado and in England, at least. How funny is that.

Genius is more often found in a cracked pot than in a whole one. ~ E.B. White

This morning was cool for the first time in several days so the grandboys and I decided it'd be a good day for a bus ride and walk. I'd given them some of those cheap disposable cameras to take pictures a while back and I've been meaning to get them in to Walgreen's to get the film developed. I am notoriously bad about doing stuff like that, so those cameras have been battered and banged about and chucked in to the bottom of the toy bins more than once. In fact, we had to empty out one of the bins this morning to find one of the cameras. Once we got them collected we took off to walk the two blocks to the bus stop where we'd catch the first bus on our trip.



Coopy loves to hold the bus tickets as we walk along and as we wait for a bus to come. He's quite reliable. He considers himself quite the big boy being given this responsibility and takes it quite seriously. He has never lost or dropped one yet. So when the bus pulled up I lifted him on to the step as Dylan stepped on too and started to get on myself when Cooper looked at me with a stricken look on his face and said, "Ahma! Ticket!" and pointed back out behind me. I turned around and sure enough...the ticket sat in the middle of the sidewalk. So I asked the driver to hold on a sec while I went to retrieve it. I stepped down. And the next thing I know, I'm on the ground. Right on my rear end! In the middle of the sidewalk. But I swooped up the ticket, hopped on the bus, and deposited it in the kiosk. The driver, a woman around my age, was so concerned. "Are you sure you're ok?" I laughed and said yes, I was just fine. The only thing bruised was my dignity. She reassured me, "Honey, no one saw you except me anyway." And I looked back in the bus and all there were for passengers was an older man nodding off in his seat and a teenager with ear plugs hunched over texting away. I sat down with the boys and she and I began to chuckle. "Oh, the things you get to see during the working day, huh? At least when I sat on my seat I was well-padded!" I said. That got us both to giggling and she said, "Honey, you just went down so smooth!"

When I go in for crash-landings that's how I like to do it....smooooooooooooth!

I blame it on my progressive lenses. That's the third time I've misstepped. My depth perception is very tricky with them.

Anyway...we did our walking and our bus transferring and made it to Walgreen's and back and bought a pizza for lunch. The boys took a good nap. I read several pages of a book my bloggy friend Pam had written about on her blog. Dylan woke up first and we went out back to check on the garden. My neighbor Sharon called over the fence and asked us to come over...she wanted to show something to me. She and her husband just had new grass planted in their back yard and they're leaving on Friday to go to Yakima to visit her sick aunt so she showed me the grass and asked if I'd be kind enough to water it on Saturday for them. Not a problem.

Dylan and I went back home and as I was getting some juice for the boys he came in to the kitchen and asked, "Gram, why is Sharon going to Yakima?" And I told him about her aunt who's very sick. He wandered off and then came back to me a few minutes later. "Gram," he said, "Can we pray to Jesus right now and ask Him to make Sharon's aunt all better?"

Oh, that touched my heart! And when I told Sharon about it later, needless to say it touched hers, too.

So of course I said yes, and he hugged me as we prayed together.

A little child shall lead them.

A Little Night Music....

Watering a garden at 4:30 in the morning is a peaceful time. In our back yard, it's definitely doing it by the light of the moon or, at this time of month, by the stars. As I stood there spraying the hose and gazing up at the heavens I could see Mars twinkling white, then red, in the distant skies.

My daughter's voice spoke up like a ghost from the back porch. "Are you out there, Mom?"

"Yes," I replied.

She talked to me for a few minutes while she had a drink of juice. Then she headed back to bed. Some people in this world have the luxury of sleeping in until 7:30.

When she arrived home last nite she told me, "Do you know that your hair glows in the dark?" She said that was the way she was able to spot me, out there in the darkness of the back yard. My silvery hair glows!

Senior Exercise Program

(Click on the photo to enlarge if you have a hard time reading it.)

If you mess up, 'fess up. ~ Author Unknown

OK. I'm at war. In the flowerbed that runs the length of the east side of our house, someone let their big dog "do his duty" - or hers - right at the edge along the sidewalk. Right next to the carnation plant my grandsons gave to me on Mother's Day. And it was a BIG "duty", left there in all its stinky glory to smother my carnations and attract a multitude of flies on the hot days we're having lately. I. am. not. going. to. touch. it. It's the principle of the thing. It's also against the law here in Portland not to curb your dog. And if I ever catch them letting their dear darling precious substitute-for-a-child dog poop in my yard again, I will 'collect' it. And I will follow them home. And I will, quite unceremoniously dump it on their doorstep. This message is for you, Buster or Busterette. Consider yourself warned.

End of story.

Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. ~ George Bernard Shaw

The Dash Poem

by Linda Ellis

I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end

He noted that first came the date of her birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years

For that dash represents all the time
That she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not how much we own;
The cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.

So think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left,
That can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough
To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger,
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect,
And more often wear a smile
Remembering that this special dash
Might only last a little while.

So, when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent your dash?

©1996 Linda Ellis

And I thought I have my hands full....

I will never, ever complain about my grandboys being busy ever, ever again. I think I'll keep this video in my archives so I can remind myself whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed. What do you think, Judy?

Man is the only creature that refuses to be what he is. ~ Albert Camus

1. Was your dad named after anyone? No, but his name meant "victorious lion". I find that especially funny when it comes to astrological signs because he was a Leo. Since he was born in 1921 I don't think my grandparents named him after astrology, tho!

2. What do you think is the minimal age to get married? That soooooooooo depends on the couple who are thinking about getting married. My Dear Hubby and I were 21 and 20. Just a couple of wild, carefree kids. We waited a couple of years before we brought kids into the picture, tho. We still had some growing up to do ourselves, and we had SO much fun together those first couple of years. But the majority of marriages don't make it any more, do they? Does anyone even bother? So many of today's young seem to just wander from one relationship to another. If most of them are the children of divorce, can we blame them?

3. What’s the longest time that you‘ve been involved with the same person? Well, that depends on what kind of 'involvement' you're talking about. For a personal relationship I've been with Dear Hubby for 36 years. For a friendship, my best friend Lizzee and I have been together since 1967.

4. What actor/actress do you consider hot at the moment? Because at the age of 80 he still looks remarkably great, my vote goes for Clint Eastwood!!!

5. What is you favorite album by a band? "Viva la Vida" by Coldplay

6. What is your favorite album by an individual artist? "Bare" by Annie Lennox

7. What is something that you‘d rather be a bit dirty? Because I spend the majority of my time barefoot, by the end of summer my feet are SO calloused! I don't mind them being a little bit dirty.

8. What was the last TV show that you watched? I'm not going to count tonite's local news. It would have to be an episode of "House Hunters International" I had taped on the DVR.

9. How many people have you met from the blogosphere? Who are they? I haven't met any face-to-face if that's what you're asking here. In the past when I had tons of pen pals thru the years I did meet some of them. Some experiences were great, others disasters. So that makes me a little gun shy about meeting people.

10. What's your philosophy on life? To live in the moment. I've had a lot of roller coaster moments in my life since 1999. They have taught me to try and savor each day to its fullest, to be content with what I have and who I am, to count my blessings, and especially to stop and smell the roses.

11. Do you think prescription drugs are over prescribed? Yes.

12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest? I think most secrets are more destructive than the truth. Depending on how damaging it could be to you to know the secret, I would really pray about how to break the news to you, to seek wisdom and grace before the revelation.

13. What is your favorite memory in the last year? I couldn't even begin to limit it to just one.

14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure? Rollo candies that I put in the freezer, then savor them as they melt in my mouth. It's not one I indulge very often but maybe once a year I just HAVE to. What's so strange is, without a sense of taste now, I can't even taste them! But I love the melting gooey quality of them in my mouth.

15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you: I can wiggle my eyeballs rapidly from side-to-side.

16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they? The first would be to live long enough to see my grandsons grow to adulthood. The second would be to have decent health until I die so I can still get around on my own. And, three, never to be a burden to my children.

17. Who would you want to get together with and make a cake? My grandsons are a blast to cook with, so probably them.

18. Which country is your spiritual home? Heaven, in the azure above.

19. What is your big weakness? Not asking for help when I need it. It was so deeply ingrained in me as a child that I could do anything my brothers could do, that being a girl was no excuse for being a 'sissy', that I have always been independent to a fault.

20. Do you think Judd Corizan is a good person? I don't have a clue who Judd Corizan is.

21. What was your best/favorite subject at school? English

22. Describe your accent: Very 'homogenous' as far as American accents go. Tho my New England relatives tell me I say my "R's" very hard. But they don't say them at all. Here in the Pacific Northwest we basically sound like your everyday bland newscasters.

23. If you could change anything about yourself, would you? I would be more affectionate.

24. What do you wear to sleep? Saggy-baggy, comfortable old sleep shirts

25. What is your favorite casual outfit to wear? Capris/jeans with a knit t-shirt.

26. Do you use cigarettes or alcohol? Never

27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!) If it was you, the one who wrote these questions, who had only one day to live, I don't know what you'd do. But if it was me, I'd spend it making sure I knew I was going to make it to heaven.

28. Rate the memes that you play generally. Use any scale or just in order. I don't get into the habit of doing them a lot, tho if I find one that I think will give my grandsons insight into who I am - when and if they read all this jabber someday - then I'll do it. I can't really rate them. I've come across some bloggers whose whole blogs are nothing but Monday-thru-Sunday memes and I stay away from those. Why even blog if you can't come up with any original content? I thought that was the whole idea behind it.

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. ~ Proverbs 15:1

I made an emergency trip to Fred Meyer the other afternoon to pick up some milk, juice, bananas, and diapers...the grandboys were napping and Dear Hubby was home. As I got out of my truck I witnessed an exchange between two people:

An overweight woman about my age had just finished putting groceries in her car. Instead of taking the empty cart to the cart bin maybe 50 feet from where she was parked she just gave it a push and sent it sailing across the parking lot, not even looking to see where it was going or if anyone was in its path. A man who was getting in to his truck stopped and looked at her in disbelief.

"HEY!" he yelled. "What do you think you're doing?!"

She looked at him and gave him an 'I could care less' shrug.

That set him off!

"You stupid EXPLETIVE! EXPLETIVE! You can't even walk it over to put it away?! No wonder you're so EXPLETIVE FAT!!!!"

(I'll leave the EXPLETIVE words to your...imagination. It doesn't take much to fill 'em in.)

Two wrongs don't make a right.

So much for the society we live in...

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk. ~ Doug Larson

TWO WOLVES

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle
that goes on inside people.

He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.
"One is Evil.

It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good.

It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather:
"Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied,

"The one you feed."

It's a new look, I know.

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. ~ Theodore Roosevelt

"Pioneer Woman" sculpture by Norman Frater

This is something I wonder about. In the past several months there's been a lot written about the "Pioneer Woman" blog and the lady who writes it. She's been on TV, had a book published.

She and her family seem to be living under a glaring spotlight of intense scrutiny. I rarely visit there but every now and then I'll see the blog on someone's sidebar and I'll click on it and stop by to read a post or two. It's a beautiful blog...gorgeous photos, great writing. But maybe I'm just weird. When it gets to the point where you have 726 comments to slog your way thru, how do you do it? How do you keep up with your reading 'audience'? How is she able to keep it real, to keep it fresh? How does she cope with the pressures of always having to come up with something that will keep bringing all those readers back?

I think all of us who consider ourselves writers dream of fame and fortune, of having our work published and our names up in lights -- or at least recognizable to the public. If truth be told, I think we're all a little envious when we read of someone who's attained such fame in the blogging world. But who am I kidding? I'm nowhere near Ree's range of talent as a writer, a photographer, a homemaker. I'm just a silver-haired-50-and-getting-ever-closer-to-60-something-stay-at-home grandma plunking her way across the keyboard on a more-or-less daily basis. Mega-fame isn't something I think I'd want to have to deal with at this stage in life. But then again, there was Grandma Moses, wasn't there? I dunno...maybe I'm strange. But one of the things I love about coming here into my own little corner of the blogosphere is having the small circle of blog friends I'm able to still keep up with. I don't have the time to navigate my way thru dozens of blogs a day. Those I keep up with are those I consider friends as much as I do the people I know face-to-face. Getting a comment or an email from them gives me as much pleasure as finding a snail mail letter in the mail box used to give me. I like it this way. I like the personal side of blogging.

So...I'll just keep coming back here at 3:30 in the morning, sitting at my grandma's desk with my bed-head of wild hair, barefoot and in my saggy-baggy old comfortable sleep shirt. Sipping my coffee. Hoping the cobwebs in my brain will blow away. And never having to worry about 'keeping up with the Joneses' out there in the rest of the bloggy world.

They say genes skip generations. Maybe that's why grandparents find their grandchildren so likeable. ~ Joan McIntosh

Dylan and Dear Hubby went on Dylan's first camping trip ever this weekend. This is mine and Dear Hubby's "Hill" outside of the town of Madras in Central Oregon. He and I have been camping out there forever and we rarely ever see any humans. Only deer, antelope, coyotes, and free range cattle meander by...and occasional jackrabbits. Dear Hubby tells me rattlesnakes are around there, too, but I've yet to spot any. Dylan makes the third generation to camp on 'our' hill.

Darling Dylan, just chill-laxing.

A full time job...scooping and flinging dry cow patties!

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. ~ Sally Field

I found this in my email this morning:

During the month of July, the International Blogging Recognition Council (IBRC) had the pleasure of reviewing your blog "A Shelter From the Storm". Your blog was referred to IBRC through our Refer-A-Blog program. "I've got nothing to say but it's ok...good morning! - The Beatles" was the topic that the Council reviewed. Based on the review, the Council has recommended that your blog receive IBRC’s designation of “Recognized Blog”. IBRC reserves this honor to those blogs that effectively connects with the audience and promotes the sharing of ideas and experiences.

I don't know who referred me, but if you're one of my 'unknown' readers who comes by and never comments...if you're someone near and dear to me who comments often...thank you.

Some persons are very decisive when it comes to avoiding decisions. ~ Brendan Francis

I recently wrote about being one of a set of twins. My twin died in utero and even tho we never shared life in the outside world, I've always felt as if a part of me is missing. There are even 'syndromes' about such a thing: Vanishing Twin and Lost Twin. I had no idea either existed until I typed in "lost twin" a few years back in a Google search, wondering if there was any one out there who shared the same lost feeling I have at the core of me. Shocking to me, there are probably millions.

After writing about this I had several comments and emails about it. It brought to mind one of those 'family secret' stories passed down thru the generations that I thought I would share because I think in itself it's quite unusual but very interesting. Interesting to me because it seems destined that whole sets of twins don't seem to survive in my family. So...I thought I would share this with you. I have a feeling I might've touched on it somewhere in the past but with almost 1000 posts in my archives on this blog and several hundred on my 'first' blog...well, the thought of digging thru those is so daunting I'll just leave it alone and start from scratch. And it was so long ago I might've written about it most of you wouldn't remember it anyway.

My paternal grandmother gave stillbirth to a set of twins, back around 1920. As to whether they were boys, girls, or one of each I don't have a clue. But as the story has been passed down to me by my mother, my grandmother was recovering in the hospital afterwards and that is where this story begins. My grandmother died when I was 3 years old so I don't remember her. I don't know what type of person she was emotionally to try to gauge just how this might've affected her. My oldest brother is 6 years older than me and was 9 when she died...he's told me she was one of the best grandmothers in the world. I do know she was also a Christian woman, so I'm sure she must've felt the assurance in her heart that someday she would be reunited with her two 'lost' babies. But I imagine the reality of losing them at that moment in time must've been tragic.

Grandma had a roommate, a French-Canadian Catholic woman who'd just given birth to her 12th or 13th child. As my grandmother lay there in her bed she couldn't help overhearing the conversation the woman had with her husband when he came to visit. They both spoke about how they had no idea how they were going to feed and clothe yet another little one. They were already under tremendous strain trying to provide for the others already there. As Grandma listened a seed sprouted in her heart and when my grandfather came to visit her later in the day she told him of the other woman's dilemma. "Why don't we ask if we can adopt the baby girl?" I believe they'd already lost my uncle, a toddler who'd died from spinal meningitis. My grandfather agreed, and they approached the other couple with their idea.

I don't know how all the details were ironed out, but the little girl was adopted by my grandparents and christened with the name Claire. In those days adoption was kept very quiet in families for the most part. And even tho Claire was olive-skinned and had dark hair and stood out in photos amongst all the fair Swedes and English family members, she grew up not having a clue she was adopted. My father, who was their natural born son, came along a few years later. He never knew Claire was anything but his natural sister.

When my grandfather died when I was 10 my dad and I went to his house to sort thru Grandpa's belongings. My dad found a strong box stashed away filled with all kinds of papers and tucked in among them were Claire's adoption papers and Birth Certificate. To say my dad was stunned is an understatement. But my brothers and I were told the news. I guess my parents figured with Claire living in New England and us living here in the NW, especially in the 50s and 60s when air travel was a luxury and not an every day occurrence for so many like it is today, they figured the odds of us seeing Aunt Claire and spilling the beans was pretty remote. Even so, we were sworn to secrecy. When I finally did meet her, in 1968 when I was 14, I wonder what she must've thought of me, peering at her so intently most of the time. But her unknown history -- to her, anyway -- and knowing I had such an important secret stowed away deep inside made her quite mysterious and special to me.

Years later, when one of Claire's sons joined the military and was shipped overseas to Europe, she was going to take a trip to visit him. When she applied for a Visa, tho, she needed a copy of her birth certificate, which she didn't have but my father did...when he'd found it in Grandpa's strong box he'd never sent it to her. So dad mailed it off...and a few days later he received a rather hysterical, frantic phone call from his sister. What did this MEAN, she was adopted?! No WAY was she adopted! Grandpa and Grandma were HER parents! When dad had found out her history he'd had no idea how to tell her...emotional issues were never his strong point. Instead of preparing her for it, he'd decided to let the Birth Certificate tell her the news.

It was this incident, in knowing this secret for so long....and other important life secrets that belong to other family members that have had devastating affects when they've also been revealed...that have made me be honest with our children. Sometimes probably even bluntly honest. But skeletons in closets usually don't portend any good news. Being forewarned is forearmed...I've felt that way in every aspect of raising children. My children grew up knowing all about whatever's been hidden away in generational memory vaults. And as to my history and Dear Hubby's history...they know all about our faults and foibles, too.

I guess in some ways too much knowledge can be a bad thing. But there is also safety in knowledge. Comfort in knowledge. Security in knowledge. And there is love in knowledge.

For Dyl and Coopy...

Your lives are jam-packed with rhythms.

Rhythms to the inner rhymes

you hum and play to.

Routine rhythms that are

the axis

your world spins on.

They bring security

and calm.

They soothe.

The road rhythms you travel

in your

everyday life

drowse you to sleep.

Heart rhythms.

Gentle rhythms.

Love rhythms.

Lullaby rhythms.

They slip by you as elusive as

butterflies wings.

But they are there,

the music of your

lives.

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. ~ Author Unknown

I've been doing some housecleaning.

"Oh!" you say. "Is your house neat and tidy now?"

Bwah hahahahaha!

My house?! Neat and tidy? With a husband who has enough bowhunting clothes and gear to furnish 10 hunters for a week's hunt in the woods? With toys galore scattered about thru the day? With dust bunnies peeking out from under the bed until I find the time to Swiffer them away? I am buried in 'stuff'. In my personal life.

No, I'm talking about streamlining my blog. Getting rid of the buttons and all that stuff. I've always been and forever will be ad free. If I need money I'll find some other way to make it, thank you. I now have a links list entitled "My Blogging Network" and that's where you'll find all the great sites I love to visit and even write for. I started out this morning at 3:45 trying to create my own set of buttons but they were disastrous. I ran out of time and had a very balky computer to deal with, too, so I wasn't able to fix it then. But this evening I did my 'house cleaning' and now have everything alphabetically, unobtrusively, and legibly listed. All are great sites to visit, great sites to be a member. Oh, and I got rid of all my labels, too.

So...what do you think? I like trying to keep my blog as clean and simple as I can...to let my writing tell you about my life, my interests...not buttons and badges and awards and everything else. When I come here at the end of my crazy, chaotic days, I want to be greeted by a cool seascape, restful colors...no clutter.

Now, if organizing my own life was this easy....

Safety is as simple as ABC - Always Be Careful. ~ Author Unknown

There's been a ton of national and local news focus on the mysterious disappearance of Kyron Horman, a little boy whose family lives here in Portland and Medford, Oregon. There are daily updates on our local news stations, quite often around the time my two grandboys arrive in the morning. Dylan, who's old enough to understand something's wrong, is especially affected by the story. When Kyron first disappeared from the school he attended and the search for him was at its most intense, huge military helicopters flew low over our house as they headed up in to the West Hills to help. Between the noise, the sight, and the way they made our whole house vibrate I think that's something Dylan will always associate with this little boy's tragic tale. Now, every time any kind of helicopter flies by, Dylan turns to me from watching out the front windows and asks, "Is that helicopter looking for the lost boy, Gram?" "Stranger Danger" and keeping close to us adults whenever we're out in public has truly become a reality for my four-year-old grandson.

I had promised the boys last week we'd take the bus downtown to feed the birds in the park across the street from the court house. Yesterday was the day, and when we were done we meandered around for a while, taking in the sights and doing some major people watching. As we passed in front of the court house to go to McDonald's on 6th a large contingent of news reporters and camera people were stationed outside the front doors. It's always rather surreal to see 'real' reporters face-to-face...they 'come in to our homes' on an almost-daily basis and we almost feel as if we know them. Then, to see them in their human form, you realize that nope, we don't know them that well after all...just their faces. Dylan walked up to one of the lady reporters and asked her, "Are you looking for that little lost boy?" She told him yes, she was.

We were too early for lunch at McDonald's so I told the boys we'd stop at a Burger King after we got off the bus near home. As we were sitting there eating all of a sudden Dylan shot out of the booth and went running across the restaurant, pointing excitedly and yelling, "There's the little lost boy, Gram! LOOK!" and as I followed the direction he was pointing, sure enough: a huge billboard with Kyron's grinning face along the street. "Is he found yet?"

No, darling Dylan, who worries about all the hurt and scared and lost. How I wish I could tell him Kyron's home safe where he belongs. How I wish I could tell him that all little kids have happy homes. Parents who have their acts together. Security. A home that's a haven from all the world's uncertainty and chaos.

But I can't. No matter how much I wish I could. Because he thinks Grandma has the answer to everything, and sadly I don't. I hate disappointing him.

My Boys....